With everyone getting DUIs these days, it is just a reminder that there is no need to get drunk and drive. If you enjoy getting sloshed, but need a way to get home, instead of dialing your ex, now you can phone Home James. The drivers get to you by bike, take your keys, put their scooter in your trunk, then allow you to pass out while they get you home safely. No hassles, no DUI, no problem.

The drivers show up in Mod suits and speak with fake british accents and their scooters are specially designed to be collapsible so that they are small enough to fit in the trunk of your car. Worried that while you are passed out in the back, James might run off with your car and leave you on the side of the road? Home James promises that they select only one in twenty of the drivers they interview and every driver must undergo a meticulous screening process to insure that they are qualified to drive and they also have discretion and integrity. However, while they might not run off with your car, their accent might attract your non-passed out girlfriend.

Based in LA, Home James' offices are open from 10am to 3am Monday to Saturday. Sunday drivers and early mornings must be reserved in advance. In addition to their evening and night time services, they also operate during the day as personal chauffeurs, driving their members in the comfort of their own vehicles. Lucky for you, membership is free, and the usual charge is $35.00 for the first 5 miles and $3.00 per mile thereafter. Most rides average $50, but the average DUI costs 200 times that.

Featured in TIME magazine, and with an impending reality show coming up, Home James has begun a revolution that will hopefully be driving your drunk ass home soon.

» home james!